初秋的石楠.浮在空中的湖.天.蓝

看看上次日记的日期，停笔已经快一年了。生活自然仍在继续，只是阴雨的曼彻斯特，喧闹的牛津大街，现在可以证明，已经在这一年里冲刷掉了我对生活的热情。多变的天气让人变得内敛，似乎在连绵的细雨中，所有冲动和渴望都会最终归于平静，在雨伞的遮挡下无声无息的流露。于是我开始厌恶这个磨掉我棱角的城市。拥挤的人群来来往往，从来不会有人在意路边开放的水仙，草坪上静悄悄的，而几米外的人行道上却挤着赶路的行人，每天的生活便是忙碌，这便是曼城的生活，令人窒息的生活。

 

不难想象，一次威尔士之行，六天的海滨小镇生活，对于这样生活着的我是多么的令人渴望。

 

Bangor是我们驻足的小镇。University of Wales的宿舍坐落在一个小山坡上，打开窗便是Anglesey。第一天落脚，听说山坡下有个Morrison's，于是大家便三两成群的出发了。小路蜿蜒，不久便看到了山脚下的维多利亚教堂。转过教堂的前庭便是Morrison's了。还有另外一条从学校伸延出去的小路很值得一走，从餐厅旁边的小道一路走下去，穿过一条忙碌的街道，左转，不多久便走到了一条绿树成荫的小道入口。小道很急，一路下坡，忽然一个急转弯挡住了视线，眼前身后，绿荫连成了一片，耳边却隐约传来了一波波的浪声。顺着弯转过去，眼前豁然开朗，发现自己已经驻足在沙滩上了。远处的码头隐约可见，Aanglesey岛上错落的白色农房静静的伫立在晨雾中。我突兀的脚步惊动了岸边休息的鸟儿，看它们拍拍翅膀，游向对岸去了。水面上留下了片片涟漪。

 

作为英格兰和威尔士的最高峰，Snowdon自然吸引着许多来自各地的游客，但对于我来说，留在记忆中的不仅是那天明媚的阳光，美丽的景色，还有同学们的嬉笑，John的博学和他对环境学的满腔热情。我们从lake Cwellyn出发，沿着Snowdon Ranger path一路上行，绕过Foel Goch，之后再沿着山谷走到Llanberis。Llanberis,我自认为，是个很好听的名字，也许是因为这是我们艰苦爬山路线的终点，一提到她，便自然的联想到午餐和坐在阳光下的草坪上吃午餐的我们。有了动力，大家都变得脚步轻盈，没到一个小时我们就一路小跑地走到了山下。 

 

Cwm Idwal的故事开始在几十万年前，庞大的冰河缓缓移过，削石断壁，在高耸入云的山脉上刻出了石盆，时过境迁，几十万年后，冰川消逝，山间便留下了这片宁静的水面。水面如镜，映照着峭壁，晴空和白云，静静等待着时光流逝，四季变迁。在这里，时间是停滞的，万年前自然的印记仍清晰可见，而万年后，如果人类仍在延续，依然会感叹万年前自然的鬼斧神工。Cwm Idwal最美的季节在八月，当山野间石楠绽放。石楠喜好贫乏的酸性土壤，城市里难得一见，不开花时一片暗绿，开了花便是遍山的深紫，朴实的染遍山野。

 

六天的行程，我们的脚步踏遍整个Snowdonia国家公园，在Plas Tan y Bwlch的草坪上，在Porthmadog的铁路边，在从Caernarfon到Rhyd Ddu的蒸汽火车上，在Coed y Brenin的松林里，伴着阳光，微风，和笑声。

 

today I went back to the gallery to look for my tag, one because I wanna see if it's still there, also if I could find it, I wanted to take it home with me.

 

Just like last time I came, there were piles and piles of tags hanging. Some were tied on handles of suitcases, some were pinned onto a birdcage, and others were tied onto each other, formed strings of tags.

 

The theme of that interactive art was "wish to be where". under the ceiling-high pile of suitcases, there were a few words, " if you could go somewhere right now, where would you like it to be?" 

 

 

 

ever dreamt of sitting on a waning moon, looking over the sapphirine sky..

or holding on a dandelion seed, gliding cross a verdured field..

 

dreams are never too beautiful, and with the summer to come, they will be dressed in green and blue, companied with cicada solo and cricket symphonies.

 

As for me, another school year has almost finished.

I will have to say goodbye to the little tree grow in front of my window. It remind me of the tree grow in the courtyard of William Carry, in front of Flat 9's kitchen, same small leaves, same green.

 

Then I'll move into a house with Jenny, Thanh, Stalla and Ana, a house we all dreamt of, a little place of our own, a happy place to start another good year.

 

As for Northampton, boys have all found themselves places to settle for next year, girls too.

 

Another four seasons gone by, just realized I've been spending most of my time missing another town and people and things going on over there. As life in Manchester, to be fair, has been left uncultivated.

Even so, God's providence has been generous. When I was in need, he provided opportunity. When I was lonely, he provided friendship. And the most important of all, he's been fondly to my dear friends who were in need, carried them in difficult times.

 

I like to end years in summer, not only because that's the end of each academic year, also for that's the best time of the year, the most lovable season of all, full of colors and dreams, relaxing and enchanting.

 

...one lazy summer day, laying on the grass, enjoying the after-meal tea with friends. That's the summer to come.

 

蛛蛛，菲菲，莫婵，宏宇，小白，嘉嘉，郑敏……

 

还记不记得到北安的第二天，我们跑远道去Waitrose买东西，拎着大袋小袋走在暮色渐浓的街道上，蛛蛛还忍不住在路边的电话亭往家里打了电话。后来发现Waitrose是那一片最贵的超市。

 

还记不记得宏宇和莫婵带饺子回来，我们吃了第一顿异国他乡的饺子。那天早上天很蓝，阳光从落地窗照进来。菲菲讲了好多xx的心理测试，我们笑了一个早上。

 

记不记得菲菲和宏宇过生日，我们自己烤的蛋糕，自己打的奶油。还有菲菲深情地朗诵老刘文采飞扬的祝辞。

 

还有家里一次闹鬼，我们叫来小白和薛嘉才敢拿着菜刀爬到楼上。心惊胆战地把门一个个踹开，结果什么也没发现。

 

还有一段，家里兴起运动减肥。我们在宏宇的张罗下，一起跑到家附近的一片空地去打球。菲菲还坚持了一段每天去跑步。

 

日子一天天过去。院子里的草越长越高，桌底下的报纸越垫越多，沙发上的垫子也永久性地放在暖气口旁的地毯上。尤其是冬天，那个位置是最吃香的。不过现在想来，大家的位子变来变去，唯有蛛蛛的是大致固定的，总是那个桌子旁边，背着落地窗的坐位。记得有一段我们总是夜战写作业，酸奶，巧克力，一晚上有吃有喝，有说有笑。每次都是不知不觉一晃一夜，想起时拉开窗帘，天边已微白。

 

认识郑敏比较晚，不过早就听蛛蛛她们讲起过你一人搞定一帮印度人的打工事迹。一直觉得你是个大姐姐的形象。而且你叫露露时声音特好听。就冲这个，也要争取在你们回家前回北安看你们。

 

说到回家，现在也只剩下假牙和郑敏坚守阵地了。其他人都陆陆续续地回到了祖国的怀抱。唉，想起人去屋空我们北安的家，人走了，家就不成家了。从现在起再回去，就没有你们一起回忆以前的生活了。不过露露还会回去，去看看我们初到英国时的小窝，去走走我们一起走过的街道，想想一起度过的时光。

 

好了，不罗嗦了。大家一切都好，等夏天回家了再见了。

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

 

To those families striked by tragedy and suffering in pain, to friends, and to lulu.

 

It's always easy to say, but when it comes down to reality, it's always hard to get out of the shadow.

 

Remember I told a friend not to worry, there are things in our lives that are just out of our control. But now I understand the frustration and the feeling of powerless he once felt is not easy to overcome.

 

Feeling alone, frustrated, and helpless, I guess it's not easy to try to grow up, and certainly will take awful lot of courage, faith, hope, or even tears for one to eventually get there. But grandpa and grandma did it, mom and dad did it, so I guess I'll be ok. It's just being in this so called 'waitting place' once told by Dr. Seuss is so puzzled and uncertain. Plus friends are all so far away, left me here with no one to talk to. Along with those endless depressing news on TV..oh mama miya, what a place to be.

 

But hopefully I've learnt something, not gonna mess it again this term. Just like friend has told me, friends don't need to be together to hold the friendship, guess I was too greedy and demanding and scared of losing them. And after all, I've got Janny, Sarah, Nur, Staph, Matt, Dan and Paul here. So inshallah I'll be ok. 

 

Fingers crossed.

 

P.S. need a new light bulb, 240v 60w. The old one busted, guess I talk too much.

Well, since somebody's gonna get a hurt real bad, I might as well carry on.

 

Advise No. 1, never listen to what arab boys say when it has anything to do with time management.

 

If they say 'be right back', that means 'ok I'm leaving, but you might see me sign back in in the next 24 hours'. If they say 'I'm coming' when you called from the station, that means 'ok skatina, just stay somewhere warm, I'll be there before the station close'. Or if they say 'wake me up at ten', they are actually saying 'nah, just leave it, not gonna go to the lecture in the morning'. So there's no need to get stressed, just get on with your life, and remember to say good morning when they eventually wake up at sunset.

 

Also remember, a Lebanese 'maybe' is a NO, and when they actually say NO, never argue, or you'll have to sleep on the couch for the rest of your life.

I'm talking about the end of the Bourne Identity. Remember Marie's scooter store? Bear it in mind..picture my house.

 

My house should have a roof red as the just riped cherry, and walls white as the mid-day sun.

My room will be full of flowers, and the windows shall be open all day long, so my room would smell like the salty sea.

 

And the sea my house is over looking, should be just as blue as my pastel, and has a name romantic like mediterranean, exotic like the caribbean.

 

And I shall dress in red, with a bow in my hair, facing the sea, watching the sailboats shining among the waves.

 

close my eyes, feeling the breeze, the tide..

 

smile..